And I thought I had it bad

I think I need to change my Ph.D. to Horribleness.

Also, viewers be aware: this piece of, er, uhm, horribleness? will only be up until Sunday.

It's like this shirt was made for me.

Circumstances Most Mysterious

The bad economy is becoming absurd, and its repercussions are being felt even here at KBS. The number of homeless people in the area is increasing at an absurd rate; this very afternoon I set up several tents to control the amount of water on certain patches of grass provide these hobos with shelter from the rain; but alas, even this hard work is to no avail, as now there is, in fact, a hobo who has set up camp in my very yard! Unfortunately I am very busy with work this week, but I believe I shall ask Lisa, who is vacationing here at the moment, to investigate this phenomenon. Perhaps she can shed light upon this great mystery.

I am a hero

The situation was dire. Many had gathered at Lindsey's abode last Saturday in anticipation of watching the Red Wings crush the Pittsburgh Penguins in game 4 of the Stanley Cup playoffs. The TV was turned on and the audience was waiting with bated breath for the game to begin when suddenly (horrors!) the cable went out! The evil cable company had chosen this exact time for their equipment to fail because it would do the most damage to the psyche of Michigan hockey fans. Alas, it seemed as if the villain would triumph and Lindsey would go crazy with rage and nervousness!!!

However, I would not allow this injustice to persist. I immediately leapt into action, sped home, and returned with the one item that could overcome this dastardly plot: rabbit ears! My disinclination toward television technology had saved the day, and all were able to enjoy the hockey game because of my quick and brave actions. I like to think I contributed directly to the Wings' glorious victory. I truly am a hero!

I am in awe

I went to Katie's dissertation defense. It was okay, I guess. Truth be told, I didn't really hear much of it. I was too overwhelmed by Carl's t-shirt, which was too beautiful for words. It was like standing a bride on her wedding day next to Angelina Jolie, or putting any old pastry brush next to the Peruvian Pastry Brush. There's just no comparison. Why, even if I had the best handlebar mustache in the world I would only have an iota of the fashion sense Carl has! Oh, if only I had a puffy-painted designer shirt of my very own!

Desk entropy

I was amazed at the accuracy of this Ph.D. comic in depicting the trajectory my desk has taken over the years (click on the comic for a bigger view). I can only hope that I manage to get my desk to the final stage depicted in this comic by the time I defend.

Challenge Me!

This past weekend, I amazed party goers at KBS by successfully completing both the cinnamon challenge and the flour challenge on the same night!!! What are these difficult, strenuous, and manly challenges, you ask? They involve eating a select amount of an item (cinnamon or flour) dry, without the aid of any externally produced liquid swallowing agent. What especially impressed the witnesses of my triumph was my eagerness to attempt these challenges without the aid of the large amount of liquid courage normally associated with such amazing endeavors.

First, I downed a teaspoon of cinnamon with ease. Not having learned my lesson, I next consumed a tablespoon of dry flour!!! If only someone had videotaped the event and posted it on Youtube....

Sadly, I learned after completing both of my feats that the cinnamon challenge was administered incorrectly. It was supposed to be a tablespoon of cinnamon as well, thus I only completed 1/3 of the cinnamon challenge. In order to prove that I can accomplish the entire challenge, I will eat a tablespoon of cinnamon the next time I am in Lansing if my blog readers will encourage me to do so. Please, provide me with cinnamon and lots of peer pressure and I will be happy to perform the historic feat for you all!!!