DE-FENSE!

They say that the best defense is a good offense. My baked goods are never found to be offensive¹ ... but you are certainly invited to show up Wednesday in football pads and helmets to assist with the Q&A segment. BYOSC.


(¹ It's because I avoid the scourge of mixing peanut butter and chocolate. Like ammonia and bleach, I tell you.)

On mustaches and women

What is this? Another mustache-related post? Perhaps I should change the subtitle of my blog to "Love, Happiness, Data, and Mustaches."

That being said, if I ever get married I am registering for this salt and pepper shaker. This also, of course, explains why I say "if" I get married; I cannot fathom why, but for some strange reason, most women do not quite seem to comprehend the wonders of the mustache, and regrettably, most would say something to the effect of "Shave RIGHT NOW" or "No we cannot decorate the house with photographs of famous mustaches." While I am a firm believer in compromises in relationships--I may even be okay with staying in a relationship with someone who is better at St. Petersburg than me--my unfailing love of the 'stache shall not be denied, and if it came to a choice between ending a relationship or getting rid of my growing collection of mustache-related artifacts, I must admit that the mustache would win every time.

A great cause!

Hello faithful readers,

I just learned of a great cause that fits perfectly with my values: grow a handsome mustache, and help support kids that have cancer!

Read about this great cause here.

Unfortunately it's too late for me to join this year, but maybe next year! If I do, I will gladly accept encouragement and donations for this cause. You can see the mustache progress of the brave & generous contestants this year by clicking on the "Browse the 'Staches" tab.

Ellen is trying to kill me

It's true! It must be! Two death attempts only a week apart confirm it! First last week she gave me a heart attack with the surprise "party," and then on Saturday, she repeatedly challenged me to sword duels and caused me to injure my hand severely! I mean, sure, the duel was on WiiSports and the hand injury came when I actually managed to beat her, flung my arms up in a victory motion, and hit my hand against the low ceiling... but the point is, I'm beginning to think that she's a serious health threat to me!

Important News Bulletin

Since I know many of you were concerned about my health this afternoon, I just wanted to let everyone know that I AM okay, I AM home from the hospital now and resting comfortably, and the doctors WERE able to repair the damage to my heart caused by the shock of about a dozen people jumping out of my dining room screaming "Surprise!" and "Happy Birthday!"

This ends this important news update. We now return to our regularly scheduled lack of updates.

I'm going to do it!

It is the birthday of one of my two favorite people as mentioned in the last post. And, for her birthday, in order to make her the happiest woman in the world, I'm going to... join Facebook! Is that not truly the best gift I could ever give her? And, heck, it'll make my OTHER favorite person happy too! It's a win-win!

The most important meeting of the decade!

I am absolutely delighted that two of my favorite people in the world, Ellen and Lindsey, have finally met! After years of hearing about each other all the time but never meeting in person, it was high time for these two amazing women to interact. They even got to share cooties when Ellen shared her water bottle with Lindsey in the stifling Albuquerque heat, and then again when they split an order of spinach artichoke dip for dinner. Although I was not actually involved in any way in orchestrating this meeting, the fact that it occurred just shows that the universe knew that Lindsey and Ellen were destined to finally meet, with or without my help!